5 SIGNS IT IS TIME TO BREAK UP WITH YOUR BOYFRIEND






Romantic relationships are the most intimate relationships we experience.

Quite often, women and even men, lay themselves bare emotionally before the other person almost from the beginning.

On top of all that vulnerability is the amount of time and effort that goes into maintaining one.

Then there are the memories of all the good times. When you were the happiest you have ever been.

So I understand why break ups are very hard.

Breaking up feels like throwing away all that intimacy, vulnerability, time, effort, memories and even happiness.
But bad relationships can damage you in ways you cannot begin to imagine.

The longer you stay in a bad relationship, the more broken and hopeless you begin to feel.

Bad relationships, even with good people, can trap you in a hell of your own making. 

Bad relationships often mature into bad engagement and then terrible marriages which end up with emotionally baggaged children making your same mistakes.

You can break the cycle now.

Here are 6 signs that you need to walk away from this relationship now:



1. ABUSE

Whether it is emotional or physical, whether you are the victim or the perpetrator.

If there is any form of abuse in the relationship, end it today.

If you are the victim of emotional abuse like manipulation, gas lighting, insults and demeaning words, it is not your fault.

Abusers can turn anything into a provocation.

You should not feel any shame if you have been physically abused.

You are not responsible for the other persons actions. It does not matter what people will say, get out and get help.

If you are the abuser because I know a lot of women who are emotionally abusive and they never even realise it, set the person free and start working on yourself.

Some women use and manipulate the men in their lives.

They wield their love like a weapon and are always ready to cry and bring drama when they do not get their way.

If you are that woman, you can still change. You can learn to be less selfish and less manipulative.

There is hope for you but you need to set your current victim free so that they do not experience anymore of your abuse even as you try to get better.

Some women are even physically abusive and they think it is okay because the guy is bigger or stronger or is a man.

It is not okay to slap a man in the face no matter what he did. Just like it would not be okay for him to slap you.


2. Differences in core values or the future

Relationships are made of two people and they are bound to be differences.

Diversity brings beauty to a relationship.

However, there are certain differences, like having or not having kids, where a compromise cannot be reached. You either have or don’t have kids.

If you keep fighting about your values on money, family, religion and other core principles, you may need to call it quits.

Do not get me wrong, a minimalist and a non minimalist can live together. A democrat and a republican can live together happily.

There are some differences which do not need to break you up. Both of you just need to find a way to respect each others differences and even appreciate them.

I do not mean to be preachy with the following example. It is just a real and practical example of a difference in values that is a good reason to break up.

Christian singles know 2 Corinthians 6:14 in the Bible which forbids us from marrying non Christians, calls it being unequally yoked.

Because it is fundamental issue for me, if my boyfriend denounced Christianity, I would break up with him.


3. Constant fighting and disagreements

Some people just cannot communicate with one another. If you find that is the two of you, for how long do you think you can live like this.

If you are constantly solving issues in a relationship, if every little thing triggers an argument, after you have tried to fix it, just walk away.

Not all relationships end up in happily ever after. You do not need to force it.

If you have not yet tried to learn how to communicate better, do that first before you call it quits.

4. Cheating

Cheating is not okay. Cheating is a betrayal of trust and an indication of disrespect.

It may even be part of a bigger problem of sex addiction or a host of other issues like self loathing. 
At the very least, cheating is a clear indication that one person is discontent in the relationship. 
If you are the cheater, I am not excusing your behavior, but try and ask yourself why you felt you needed to step out of the relationship to get your needs met.

You probably have some deep issues that you need to work through and it is better that you set the other person free while you sort them out.

If you were the one who was cheated on, this behavior is unacceptable and you shouldn’t tolerate it.

You can and you will find better than him.

You deserve someone who is emotionally matured enough and selfless enough to work on their own relationship instead of going to other people.


5. Lack of trust

Lack of trust either means that one person is untrustworthy or that one person is insecure.

Relationships are build on trust precisely because of what we talked about in the introduction.

The deep intimacy, the inherent vulnerability, all the effort and time investment and the precious moments.

A relationship without trust is a bad bargain for both parties. 


6. If one person does not feel it anymore

The unfortunate reality is that people lose interest in the relationship or in the other person.

Your relationship should be built on two people committing to stick around when things get hard. But a relationship is not a marriage.

If you want out and you cannot see yourself with these person for the rest of your life, get out before you get trapped.

Do not feel bad if the other person wants out. Set them free. Set yourself free.

Even if they are not saying it, you may notice that someone does not want to be with you anymore but feels obligated because of how much you have been through together.

Break ups are not supposed to be easy but better a break up than a divorce. Leave now. Do not drag this bad relationship out any longer.

If you have any other reasons why people should break up, comment down below.

Also, read this article on how to break up with someone kindly.


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